Publicly Unveiled

I choose...

2012-01-16T19:05:00.004+08:00

Six AM
Radio Playin'
Stumble out of bed
Runnin' out the door
A brand new day
Never thought I'd have this feeling
Never thought I'd get this far
But I'm okay

Yes, I stumble out at six AM. Sort of. Except I don't stumble out of bed. I frequently sleep on the floor with a mattress despite owning a bed and a room.

And definitely not at six. Sometimes at five, sometimes a little after six. Sometimes not at all - because I stayed up all night, studying.

Lately I have found that life is dangling a bait in front of me and pulling it away as soon as I am close enough to reach it.

Enrolling in the Personality course for 2012 Spring Semester really is a change of pace. I find the course to be interesting.

Indeed, I may find myself analysing my own personality before the course ends.

As for my other endeavours, I have not written a fic for the longest time. Music, on the other hand, is quite different for me. Despite having sold off our favorite piano, I still read piano and orchestral scores as I listen to music. Sometimes, when I know the music off the top of my head, I can picture the tones, the notes as I go along the score. I'm not very musically inclined, but I really love how the notes just progress from forte to pianissimo, the increasing velocity and sometimes the ritardando... It's like reading your favorite book over and over again.

So even if my piano isn't with me, it's quite alright when I have the scores to whet my appetite. Perhaps some day, when I can afford a digital one, I might buy it.

My piano teacher whom I met about a month ago after 3 years, asked me and my sister about our piano skills. We had to tell her we'd sold off the prized piano, but we still train our fingers as we look at piano scores.

She seemed really supportive and told us to save up for one. I remember her fondly and loved her classes although we'd sometimes play hooky and didn't have the mood to attend it. Really hope that I'd be able to play on a real piano again in future.

So here's to new wishes, new hopes, everlasting success in everything and God's blessings.

Thank you, Allah, for all you've given me thus far.

Spring Break Ends...

2011-05-25T20:33:00.002+08:00

As with everything else, the brief break/holiday comes to an end...

It's already the 3rd -and final- week of holidays. The spring break is coming to a close. Next Monday will mark the beginning of the Summer Semester.

Summer Semester????

Yeah, well, here, in a country where everyday is kinda like summer, there's no such thing as summer break. But I may be wrong, though. It may be just the private colleges... or am I making this up?

See what the end of spring break does to me?

It's been sweltering hot these past few months. The weather's been unpredictable, and rain may fall when it is least expected.

The spring break has been rather short for me. The first week, I was busy with the editing and finishing touches of the video exams plus its submission. The 2nd week was about cleaning the house, picking up the backlog (is that even the proper term?) of laundry, etc. and the 3rd week -this week- my grandma has come over to our house for two weeks.

Hmmm... on another note, I was thinking of going out to buy Kimchi during the weekend at the local Lotte Mart. They have home-made kimchi sold there.

This weekend will be the last for the spring break. I really want to take the opportunity to do some last minute shopping. Haha.

Then, there's the animes my friend has given me (and I really want to finish them before the new semester starts)... which I have gone through about half of them.

Happiness abound!

Hmm.. look at the time... I need to log off.

Well, ja ne!

Rant

2011-05-24T11:39:00.002+08:00

I want to be able to have fun on my own, rather than stay at home alone doing nothing but chores all day, all week for the whole semester break. The boredom and loneliness is too much to bear and I find myself reduced to tears.

Loneliness is such a harsh thing to bear, for without the company of at least one other person, and an unreliable cable which shows nothing but static, it's a perfectly boring place to be in. I don't want to spend all day in front of the computer - I want to be out there, walking, looking at things I probably wouldn't buy, but enjoying the exercise none-the-less. But this loneliness just makes the computer an unmoving, emotionless companion.

For the first time, I'm writing something non-optimistic.

I wanted to follow my sister (imouto) to the shopping complex, not to tag along with her friends, but to go the shops I long to go to (away from her and her friends)... like the sushi counter, the giant Japanese cream puff stall... but I know she doesn't like it. So, despite my deepest wish, I told her that it's alright if she didn't want me to follow. Her readiness to agree to that kinda put me down - a lot.

In the first place, I didn't really ask to follow, but my dad proposed that I followed her. I wanted to take up that chance to breathe a little. But as a sister, you can somehow sense what your sibling is feeling. I knew she didn't want me around. So, what could I do?

She's exceedingly lucky to be able to stay somewhere outside of home and experience life away from home. Although I can drive, but my mobility is limited. Dad needs to use my car, and even if I can use the car, it doesn't mean I can simply waltz out.

So here I am, at home, just like every other day, lonely.

LONELINESS.
It's such a scary word. Even if we'll be alone when we die, it doesn't mean that we have to be lonely when we can enjoy other people's company.

A year away from home has made my sister so out-of-tune from my feelings. She can no longer get the hint when her jokes are hurtful to me, when her "aloofness" meant rejection, and when she goes out with her friends and I stay at home alone looking after the house meant I would be lonely while she enjoys time with her friends.

Life, well, it cannot always be fair. Maybe I'll get my share of enjoyment... someday... somehow... if possible... god-willing.

Sigh.

There's always goodbye and hello in life...

2010-11-03T22:38:00.003+08:00

Tomorrow... Tomorrow... and tomorrow,
creeps in this petty pace from day to day

こんばんは！

I have been terribly remiss in my blogging, I know. However, sophomore year in college has kept me busy most times and it seems like everyday, there is always something to do. Though it's not like secondary school anymore since I get to choose my classes, it certainly isn't as easy as 1,2,3. I've realized that with the freedom to choose the subjects I would take for each incoming semester comes also the responsibility to keep tabs of prerequisites and wisely choose the subjects (not to mention, being alert of the subjects that are rarely offered so I won't get stuck when choosing the subjects later on).

Since my academic advisor would be leaving at the end of the fall semester, I really began to think of the handful of people who made a difference in my life so far in college.

My academic advisor has been really helpful, really understanding and a responsible as well as a concerned person throughout my freshman year and part of my sophomore year. He taught me philosophy and world religions, and his methods were impressive. It made classes nothing less than interesting, and never boring. So, I'd really want to thank him!

My ex-boss used to say (and I think the only wisdom he ever gave me -don't know about the others): Lots of people can have the knowledge, but only few can impart them.

I think that is very true. In my honest opinion, my advisor is such a person.

In college too, I have met friends who I am glad to associate with. They never realized how much they touched my life, and made my day. Just laughing with them, making jokes, listening to their angst and stories, laughing and feeling concerned together... it makes all the difference in the world. Even when I think 『寂しいな・・・』, they would make me feel that I'm not really alone as I like to think.

I also forged a long-distance friendship with someone from India. I can't believe how much we have in common by just knowing in each other through the fanfiction community. Before this, I've had pen-pals and they never lasted long since most of them were ignorant of my country (Malaysia is not Singapore, thank you very much. It neighbours Singapore. We're also not some reclusive island country off the map), or most can't seem to accept my religion (but no matter, to each their own.)

But no matter, I have plenty of friends who respects me for who I am, and I respect them for who they are. By the way, Happy Diwali/Deepavali, Ani. Tell me about it in your next e-mail, won't you?

The most important thing for me, with so many friends of different background, beliefs and culture, is tolerance that will eventually breed understanding. We learn to love each other for our differences because that is what makes us unique and truly us.

I'm a creature of peace. Are you with me? (Do join the club. Trust me, it's larger than it seems! Hahaha)

So there... I hope I do not offend anyone, and while I know everyone is entitled to their own opinion, we can't always say what we want without fully accepting the consequences. Equivalent exchange, karma, logic, whatever you want to call it. So I do apologize in advance. Life is too short to be making enemies or fight with others.

Before I log off, I'll be saying goodnight in three languages excluding English:
おやすみなさい, bonne nuit, and selamat malam.

Before I forget, Today's Pearl of wisdom:
Le monde est un livre dont chaque pas nous ouvre une page
~ Alphonse de Lamartine, Voyage en Orient VIII

Translation: The world is a book; each step opens a page for us.

Let's chew on that thought.

Bienvenue!

2009-12-15T11:01:00.002+08:00

Bonjour mes amis..

Je suis desolee.. and I know I've been rather unfaithful in terms of updating this little hobby of mine.

For the record, I've left the previous university, and I while I miss my friends, room mates and the pleasant lecturers there, I still have to say I do enjoy the new environment here.

So far, the only thing evading me is a job =)

Good news for us! My dad has been offered a job. Although it's up on the East Coast, I can't help but feel happy for him. Finally!

and does anybody here keep a LiveJournal aka LJ? It'll be better if we could connect through LJ.

I know this post isn't insightful, but I haven't felt like doing a little delving into something for insight. Next time, maybe. I hope.

Don't worry, it might just be the day after tomorrow.

Au revoir!

A Marathon of Some Sort

2009-05-12T12:56:00.004+08:00

Sometimes hope can bring the best things in life...

Greetings everyone!

I am dreadfully sorry to have abandoned my blog for almost two months! It was entirely my fault and I apologise immensely for that.

I have several news I would like to share with all of my dear readers. They will all be explained in chronological order so please bear with me.

It started towards the end of March when my last post was recorded. Back then I was busy filling out forms and such for scholarship and college/university application. Then at the beginning of April, my aunt asked me a favour: I was to help her by filling in the vacant position of clinic attendant while she waited for someone to apply for the job. Needless to say, it wasn't long before one girl did turn up on her doorstep. As it turned out, she was an acquaintance of mine through her mother.

Then a few days after, the results of my matriculation college application came out. I was pleased to find that I was accepted into one of the best matriculation centre in the country. Such an honour! Had I accepted, I would have studied science in matriculation.

However, a few weeks later, I found out that I was accepted into a university quite well-known in the country for a foundation programme in Nursing. To say that I was disappointed would be an understatement as I had applied for a foundation programme in English Language Studies. So, I decided then that I would go through matriculation and work my way to a language degree.

Just a few days after, my dad solved the problem. He himself went to the deputy dean and appealed on my behalf (I was busy that day: I had business with the bank). Suffice to say, she told my father I could change my programme when I register at the university.

Then I found out that I failed the interview for an overseas scholarship from the government. It was then I decided that I would go to the university and pursue my preferred programme there. In the meantime, I have appealed for a reconsideration on my behalf in regards to the government scholarship. It's a win-win situation.

By the way, I have resigned from my position as a primary-level tutor. It was fun, exciting and an incredible experience while it lasted. In learned a lot and it has also taught me to be more patient when dealing with stressful situations.

I have now mastered the art of filling in the bank deposit forms. Another milestone for me! So far, I've managed to open a shares account which I can use to deposit my investment earnings which is relatively safe (yep.. I'm playing it safe).

I have always hoped that I would be able to go to a reputable university, study the courses I want and not having to worry about monetary costs. Just a few years ago, I had rejections after rejections when I applied for admission into boarding schools... mainly due to my socio-economic status. Bollocks. My socio-economic status does not dictate whether I can afford paying for university myself.

While my dad is out looking for a job in the gloomy economic environment, I am looking for ways to save money so that I can be eligible for a study loan just in case I don't get a scholarship in the near future. In that case, I'm praying hard for God to help me in this.

So... before I start to rant endlessly and do a 'woe me... pity my... poor me...' impression, I better end this post.

'When you wish and hope with all the will inside of you, you never know what miracle can be wrought upon you'

C'est cela pour maintenant, le merci et la bonne journée.

Grave News.. In the Most Literal Sense

2009-03-27T07:50:00.005+08:00

There's been a death in the opposite house...

Emily Dickinson's famous poem which I have learnt in form five has rung true. At times of terrible tragedy, I have always found myself unconsciously shedding tears.

Yesterday morning, a neighbour of mine faced the death of someone close to them. The wife's aunt died in the morning while the maid was giving her some relief from her aches. She had been aching all over the body, particularly her back and her neck. So, that morning, she asked the maid to help massage her. After barely one minute, she started to list and no sooner, she was unconscious.

I was getting ready for a driving test (which, to my relief, I have passed) when I received a phone call from my aunt, who is also my neighbour telling me the news. While waiting for the instructor to fetch me, I made a brief visit to the mourning family.

I could see that the wife was crying but holding it in, from the way her red eyes looked at me, thanking me for coming by and pay my last respects (al-Fatihah, verses from Yaasin). I saw the corpse, covered by the batik cloth and I cried. The coroner had left while I was entering the compound.

After I got back from the test, I went over to her house and looked after her youngest, her daughter, who cried, begging her mother to take her to see her grandmother's sister laid to rest. The rest of the family had followed the car. Luckily, she was easily cajoled so she watched Playhouse Disney as we waited for her family to come home. She kept asking why her mother was yet to come home so I made a few excuses until her mother finally did arrive.

She was so perceptive for a child her age. For so young a child (she is five), she said her grandmother had died and that she was going to be buried below the earth where grasses grow on top. She said her grandmother was no longer alive, and that all of them are going to pray and perform the solat jenazah. She also said that God loves her grandmother and that he has plans for her -something I had told her earlier and she still understood.

It is in this moment that I honestly say: Death changes us. It may not change everything but one person's thoughts and actions leave ripples in time. God has laid the hands of fate onto us for only God knows what's in store for us. Whatever it is, God has the greater plan and as god's creation on earth, we are created by God and to God we will return.

My fellow sisters and brothers in Islam, let's dedicate an al-Fatihah for this lady who had been called back by God. Amiin.

Starlight, Starbright...

2009-03-22T23:31:00.003+08:00

Ah Vous! Derai Je Maman...

The stars are bright tonight...
- Firenze, Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone

Yes, I do quote his wisdom. The stars certainly are bright tonight as I gaze upon the night sky of Shah Alam, Selangor, Malaysia.

It is unusually bright that I felt moved. My hands suddenly moved towards the mobile phone in my pocket to make a call towards Fauzi, mi amor. He picked up his phone and told me that he was in his car and he's gazing upon the same sky as I was. Well, he said he's not at home as he's the on duty muazzin tomorrow morning so that means he's staying back at the Mujahideen Mosque in Damansara Utama.

At the time of the call, it was 10 p.m. Watched One Tree Hill @ 10.30 p.m. Poor Lucas. Dumped TWICE. Man, that's critical.

Anyway, I'm posting again in rememberance of God's gift tonight in the form of the breathtaking view of the stars tonight. Perfectly aligned to show the sign of Pisces. There were slightly more dim stars flecking the brightest of them, creating an illusion of speckles of dusty grains of sand on the beach. I only wished I could capture the view on camera but the camera could do no justice. Hence, I am typing away to keep this memorable event on black and white...

So, adios mi amigos. You'll hear from me pretty soon.

Major Changes Underway...

2009-03-22T19:37:00.003+08:00

When life suddenly sprouts turnips instead of lemons, you know you have to do something about it...

I haven't been a faithful blogger lately. Here's an excuse: the phone line was cut off so no internet connection for almost 3 weeks! Ha! How about that?

Anyway, I received my results. 8As and 2Bs. I cried because of the two Bs. At least, I thanked my teachers right after, whom, in my honest opinion have poured lots of love and knowledge my brain certainly had absorbed through those years.

By the way, I received distinctions in Physics and GCE-O English! Good news for me.

Right now, I'm trying to find relevant courses thathave to do with English Language and Linguistics though I don't mind at all doing Electronic Engineering. However, I am actually looking forward to studying my first choice and also working on a diploma of political science. I am aiming to be a lecturer OR diplomat. Let's hope I get to be the latter.

In the mean time, I am trying to enrol in language classes, particularly French and German as well as English for Business and Communication. That way I could be prepared for the challenges I would face later on when I do pursue a career in International Cooperation.

However, I am having a financial crisis. If I do not recieve a scholarship or study loan, I would have to find a part-time programme to pay for the tuition fees. If, however, I do receive one, I would be absolutely releived as my mother would not have to fork out a hefty sum of money to support my studies in uni/college. Mom would be able to pay her debts and the rent.

As for a few bright moments, I am quite content that, even without asking for rewards, my relatives still found in their hearts the compassion to award me with monetary gifts to help support my future to commend me on my SPM results.

So, without further ado, I say THANK YOU GOD! Without your blessings and compassion, I would never have the pleasures in life presented in ways I could never imagine.

By the way, I cannot play the piano anymore. Mom sold our piano to the dealer who turned out to be its first owner. So if I have a hankering to play the piano, I would have to go to my neighbour's house (we're close, by the way), just to sastisfy my addiction.

So, au revior mon ami! I'll be posting again as soon as I can.

A New Leaf Turns

2009-02-26T23:28:00.005+08:00

In life, change is inevitable...

Lately, I have found absolution. At least, that's what I have likened the new changes I could see in myself.

I've braved new challenges; opened a bank account that I actually use, opened another education fund by myself, taught 10 to 12-year-old children in 4 subjects, learned how to drive a manual car...

There's so much you can do in so little time.

Then there's that waning addiction towards japanese anime and fanfiction. Don't get me wrong, I still like them, just not as crazy as I used to.

On the other hand, I still hadn't made a dent on Liszt's La Campanella. I know I'm supposed to practice the piece but I've been sidetracked by other endeavours, namely the pieces: Musette by Mozart, Moonlight Sonata by Beethoven, Canon in D by Pachalbel, An American Tail Theme Song (my staple, I'm afraid), Pomp and Circumstance by Edward Elgar and a few Chopin works.

Suffice to say I'll have to start back from the beginning if I were to successfully play La Campanella - and avoiding note omission where possible, of course.

Besides that, there's the fact that SPM results will be announced in mid-March. I'm so nervous and scared I could vomit. At least I have done my university and college applications already. If not, I'd be in a world of trouble.

In the meantime, I'll use the time in my hands to better myself before furthering my studies. I'm sure something worth doing will come. After all, take life by the moment, take the moment as if you are living a lifetime. Take a lifetime as if there is no tomorrow. In other words, God is always your guide for tomorrow might be the day God decides to call you. Keep in mind that always do good today before your chance to do good tomorrow is taken away.

That's a piece of wisdom for now.

For the time being, it'll do.

This is me, signing out for the night.

Not Uncommon

2009-01-21T14:37:00.003+08:00

Totally pointless blab...

Well.. just to let the non-existent visitors to my blog that I will be quite preoccupied with reading Nodame Cantabile manga. It's very addictive and I'm a manga slash anime addict. That means it's a double dose of addictive activity.

Later, I shall have to practice La Campanella. I haven't continued my practice on Liszt's La Campanella on the piano. So that means my fingers are going to have a hard time. Not to mention my wrists.

On the other hand, I transposed the manuscript from Anna Magdalena's Second Notebook as I had a hard time reading the top stave in anything other than treble clef.

At least, I've gotten better at following directions. I tend to be a compulsive player so getting my hands to cooperate my intentions to follow the musical directions is another accomplishment.

Above all, there is still the fact that I'd need to work on dexterity so as to facilitate a faster tempo in my piano playing. So, dexterity first, then gradually work on increasing velocity.

The Czerny School of Velocity might be able to help.

Provided that I don't get preoccupied with learning how to drive better.

Did I mention that I have switched jobs? My last day at the children's boutique was on the 31st of December 2008. I started tutoring 2 hours a day 4 times a week on the 1st of January 2009. So far, I haven't found reason to give up on the kids.

So that's it. Let me get back to my manga in peace and serenity.

Finally

2008-11-29T06:35:00.002+08:00

One to three and finally...

Last Thursday I had my final SPM paper. Hurray.

Anyway, I am kind of scared of the results. However, I will try to busy myself with fulfilling activities.

So yesterday I walked into a children's clothing store. Applied for a part-time job and got it on the spot. I start today.

The pay's not that bad; especially considering I've had no experience and I'm just fresh out of school.

My mom laughed, in fact everybody laughed when they fond out I applied for a job at a children's apparel store. Guess they thought that I would never in a million years stand in a children's store and work there.

There is a shred of truth there. Since I didn't get Borders, I decided I'd try anything else that's going to give me the experience I need. Besides, I'd get an hour break and it's only half a day except for overtime shifts. Considering that, not bad at all.

Now I better get going. Don't want to be late on my first day!

Freedom with a price

2008-11-25T18:03:00.002+08:00

The sands in the hourglass is turning by the minute...

Hooray!

This Thursday shall be the day I will sit for the last subject for my SPM. It's unbelievable how fast the year had gone by.

To be quite honest, I'm worried about how my results will turn out. It's rather frightening. Physics was better for me than Bio and Chem. History... so and so... Additional Mathematics... umm let's hope for an A shall we? The others... quite okay.

After this, it's the anxious wait for the final results of SPM.

Come Friday, I plan to go job-hunting.

The usual time for SPM school leavers to find something to do as well as earn money for it I suppose.

What I really found interesting is that most of the Form 4 final paper at SMDU is almost similar to the SPM paper, especially science papers. It's mind-boggling.

And yeah.. I'm sorry but I'll have to thank my tutor Mr. Subra for coming over to give me a last minute fresher course on Physics. It proved to be rather useful.

Now I have to leave to get a head start on practicing my beloved piano.

Ciao

OBITUARY

2008-11-25T17:59:00.002+08:00

This is a dedication to all my loved ones who have experienced a huge loss recently.

May Allah bless these souls and put them among the 'ahli syurga'.

1. My uncle's father who had passed away this morning.

2. My friend's father who passed away on the morning of Saturday, 21st November 2008.

May my brothers in sisters in Islam dedicate al-Fatihah for those who have gone from us.

All About Studies ~maybe a little of HSM3

2008-10-30T21:38:00.004+08:00

A thought bunny jumped at the last minute...

Really... it happened to me. I've been feeling rather moody and out of sorts this week. This might be the main contributor to why I have not been updating regularly for the past few days -make that a week. If you think I'm lazy.. that might be closer to the truth than I am willing to admit.

I found that studying outside in the evening when no one is around is the best way to enjoy my biology textbook. That, and having Sakuraneko-chan playing in the background.

It's quite cool and comfy at 6 p.m. outside so it's a good time to sit on the makeshift bench outside to properly absorb the text. At least then there will be less temptations and distractions.

Did I tell you about the High School Musical on the big screen? I think not.

My mother thought it was the best out of the three. I'm inclined to agree with her. Before you ask, my mother was there as there were 7 young cousins that I had to look after. At least she took care of two of the younger ones. I get to take care of the slightly older ones. The downside of it is that I used up my savings from the money/gifts my relatives have given me to pay for their tickets. Trust me... if I hadn't made the order online for a morning screening, I wouldn't have had the early-bird discount.

On another stressing news; I am currently going on a scholarship/sponsorship hunting spree. I'm open to options. I'm not averse to taking up IB diploma programme if I'm unable to secure CAL A-Levels. STPM is the last resort as is Matriculation.

Hence, I am signing out now so that I may concentrate on swallowing my History textbook.

Ciao.

Enneagram Test

2008-10-18T09:19:00.001+08:00

Your result for The Quick & Painless ENNEAGRAM Test...

8 - the Asserter

Thanks for taking the test !

you chose AY - your Enneagram type is EIGHT (aka "The Challenger").

"I must be strong"

Asserters are direct, self-reliant, self-confident, and protective.

How to Get Along with Me

Stand up for yourself... and me.

Be confident, strong, and direct.

Don't gossip about me or betray my trust.

Be vulnerable and share your feelings. See and acknowledge my tender,
vulnerable side.

Give me space to be alone.

Acknowledge the contributions I make, but don't flatter me.

I often speak in an assertive way. Don't automatically assume it's
a personal attack.

When I scream, curse, and stomp around, try to remember that's just
the way I am.

What I Like About Being a EIGHT

being independent and self-reliant

being able to take charge and meet challenges head on

being courageous, straightforward, and honest

getting all the enjoyment I can out of life

supporting, empowering, and protecting those close to me

upholding just causes

What's Hard About Being a EIGHT

overwhelming people with my bluntness; scaring them away when I don't intend to

being restless and impatient with others' incompetence

sticking my neck out for people and receiving no appreciation for it

never forgetting injuries or injustices

putting too much pressure on myself

getting high blood pressure when people don't obey the rules or when
things don't go right

EIGHTs as Children Often

are independent; have an inner strength and a fighting spirit

are sometimes loners

seize control so they won't be controlled

fugure out others' weaknesses

attack verbally or physically when provoked

take charge in the family because they perceive themselves as the strongest, or grow up in difficult or abusive surroundings

EIGHTs as Parents

are often loyal, caring, involved, and devoted

are sometimes overprotective

can be demanding, controlling, and rigid

Renee Baron & Elizabeth Wagele

The Enneagram Made Easy

Discover the 9 Types of People

Harper
SanFrancisco, 1994, 161 pages

You liked the test?

so S P R E A D I T ! tell everyone!!!
(use Quick-Paste below)

you wanna know MORE?

so check out, what Google found
about your type...

or do you prefer to

You are not completely happy with the result?!

You chose AY

Would you rather have chosen:

BY (FOUR)

CY (SIX)

AX (SEVEN)

AZ (THREE)

Take The Quick & Painless ENNEAGRAM Test at HelloQuizzy

Again and again and again...

2008-10-17T18:52:00.003+08:00

Will it ever end...

Mom's at it again. She's been debt-ridden all year. Ever since dad quit his job so suddenly and dropped the bombshell on us -unprepared, by the way, we've had to listen to mom's complaints and woes.

Today is one of those days. I had hoped we would have a happy family after we moved to a new place, you know, start anew. It doesn't seem to be so. I offered to work part-time at the local pharmacy, doing clerical work or cashier but I'm not allowed. I'm of age, ya know. The legal age to work here is around 17 or 18.

Now she's lecturing my dad and he, as usual is turning a deaf ear. Only that I hoped he would at least listen and do something about it.

My parents keep on telling me about one another, complaining about each other. My ears are getting itchy. I know I shouldn't involve myself with their business but they dragged me into this problems. What can I do but listen and sometimes despair? Even my school cousellor had noticed by change of attitude and sullenness. Am I that obvious?

Let me go now and mope for all I care.

Graduation Day

2008-10-10T14:10:00.005+08:00

Farewell...

This is dedicated to my fellow Form 5's of SMK Damansara Utama. Remember that we sang this as our graduation song this morning to the melody played by the school orchestra? Lots of tears and hugs...

And so we talked all night about the rest of our lives
Where we're gonna be when we turn 25
I keep thinking times will never change
Keep on thinking things will always be the same
But when we leave this year we won't be coming back
No more hanging out cause we're on a different track
And if you got something that you need to say
You better say it right now cause you don't have another day
Cause we're moving on and we can't slow down
These memories are playing like a film without sound
And I keep thinking of the night in June
I Didn't know much of love, but it came too soon
And There was me and you, and then it got real blue
Stay at home talkin' on the telephone and
We would get so excited, we'd get so scared
Laughing at our selves thinking life's not fair
And this is how it feels

Chorus:
As we go on, we remember
All the times we had together
And as our lives change, from whatever
We will still be, friends forever

So if we get the big jobs and we make the big money
When we look back now, will that joke still be funny?
Will we still remember everything we learned in school?
Still be trying to break every single rule
Will little brainy Bobby be the stockbroker man?
Can Heather find a job that won't interfere with her tan?
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly
And this is how it feels

Repeat chorus

La, la, la, la; yeah, yeah, yeah
La, la, la, la, we will still be friends forever

Will we think about tomorrow like we think about now?
Can we survive it out there? Can we make it somehow?
I guess I thought that this would never end
And suddenly it's like we're women and men
Will the past be a shadow that will follow us round?
Will these memories fade when I leave this town
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly

Repeat chorus 3x

Vitamin C - Graduation Song (Friends Forever)

This morning, I wore my crisp white shirt and black dress pants. I seriously considered wearing my pink 'baju kurung' which was incidentally the same colour of the dress shirt my beau decided to wear this morning with his red tie. I should've worm the pink 'baju kurung'. We'd match then.

I arrived at school at around 7.15 am. When we arrived, everyone was getting ready. Some girls were in the toilet putting final touches before the ceremony, me included. I wasn't about going to put any mascara or the sort. Just to emphasize my lip balm -succulent taste, by the way.

When I got to the assembly area, people were already putting on their robes. I quickly put away my bag and went around asking friends for safety pins to spare. I managed to put on my robe and class code with a little bit of help.

Even before the ceremony, people were already starting to take pictures. Our teachers had to tell us to sit down and calm down. Heh, I promptly did as told anyway.

The whole ceremony was short and sweet. I particularly liked the Head Prefect's speech. Funny, bittersweet, cute, short, nice and all the right stuff. Even the Senior Principal's address was not bad. Then we all received our scrolls (Believe me when I say funny things happened during this time.. This was followed by awards for 100% attendence and best student for each course (Science, Arts/Social Science).

After that, we sang the graduation song followed by Peterpan's Mungkin Nanti to the melody played by the school orchestra. Then we sang the school anthem. I have never heard my fellow form 5 students sing that loud since form 1. I guess we all have already missed normal school life and that the song has sentimental value.

Finally, the ceremony ended. Photographs were taken and tears were shed. I hugged some of my teachers. Took pictured with them. I cried when I hugged my former Malay Language teacher, Pn Zaiton. I guess I love my teachers, especially her, more than I thought.

After that, we went for some small feast. Then the picture-taking frenzy continued after we had returned our robes.

At around 12.30 pm, my dad arrived and I got home.

Well... that's about it! The written and compressed version of Graduation Day. I hope that we could all stay in touch and never lose sight of the friendship and good times we have shared. Finally, good luck and all the best to my fellow DUrians! Let's live up to our reputation and give stellar academic performance.

Just about tertiary education

2008-10-09T14:01:00.005+08:00

Life can bring surprisingly good spring rolls...

This morning, my class was one of the chosen classes to go on a trip to Kelana Jaya for the Education fair. Needless to say, it was fun.

In fact, I met my primary school teacher whom I greatly admire. We were quite close. She was the teacher advisor when I was president of the Environmental Club in Primary 6. We had a chat about our current doings and future prospects as well as my performance in school (that was her part. I was quite embarrassed to tell her.)

Anyway, I went through a lot of colleges and local as well as international institutions. Let's put it this way, I'm confident that I want to major in English and Linguistics and minor in other languages. In order to do that, I would have to pursue a Foundation in Arts or A-Levels or equivalent. Quite a huge leap from the current Science subjects I'm currently taking right now.

After going through so many institutions, I finally narrowed it down to UCSI, Curtin and New Zealand Universities. UCSI offers English and Communication degree (3 years) after undertaking a Foundation in Arts (1 year) at any UCSI campus which is locally situated. Curtin is in Australia. I'm not so sure about going to Australia to further my studies ... it all depends on whether I will be financially able or not. As for New Zealand universities, I could probably snag a scholarship if I am able to ace all of the subjects I am currently taking in SPM (10 subjects). Foundation studies is in New Zealand, but I could take pre-U courses instead (i.e. SAM, A-Levels) if I wanted to.

If that doesn't work out, I might just be able to study Electrical and Electronics Engineering at UNITEN (Universiti Tenaga). If I get very good results, I should be able to secure a scholarship from Tenaga Nasional in some form. When that happens, less financial burden would be placed on my parents. Besides, when I'm a graduat of UNITEN, I would get an opportunity to work with Tenaga Nasional Bhd. or with UNITEN itself.

On another note, I was thinking of setting up an account with SSPN just in case I need to apply for a study loan. I need to go to BSN and apply. An RM 500 minimum savings is a must.

Besides that, I was also thinking of buying a PIN number from my school counsellor to apply for diploma programs after SPM. This is just for back-up purposes only. We can never be too careful.

Now, without futher ado, I shall excuse myself for a long-needed rest and relaxation. Tomorrow is Graduation Day! I'm graduating High School! I can't believe it's already been five years since Primary 6.

Later, I need to drop by the pharmacy to buy things as well as something for my cat's eye.

Ciao.

Eid

2008-10-07T15:55:00.002+08:00

There's always a first time...

This year, we celebrated the first day of Eid at home. Believe me, it's very boring. We ended up sleeping by the time it was three in the afternoon.

My family and I made for my mom's hometown in Muar, Johor the next day. My grandmother didn't show it but secretly, I think she was quite glad we visited her. Anyway, we were ensured a full and tiring schedule. Visiting relatives after a year of estrangement would surely spark lengthy conversations.

In the meantime, my aunt went to a wedding which turned into a funeral when the young lady who was supposed to get married died instead. Turns out, she had a hole in her heart which went undetected.

The day after, I visited my grandma's cousin. She's part Chinese and I saw a few newspapers in the language within the compound. Did I mention that the husband sells used cars. Some of them are cool and awesome.

We also visited my aunt' mother. She suffered from stroke so she had been unable to take care of herself. She cried when she saw so many people visiting her.

Then at around 8pm, after a meal of 'bee hoon sup', we left for home. My grandmother looked at me and asked, 'Are you really going home so soon?'. I was rendered speechless. Really.. I didn't know how to respond to that. Of course, it was entirely up to my parents. I looked at her apologetically and whispered a yes.

We arrived home at around 11pm. Then we received news that one of my uncle's mother-in-law had passed away. God bless her soul.

Sunday, we had an open house. Yes... eat all you can. I made shepherd's pie. My sister made brownies. My mom made asam laksa/mee rebus fusion and Nasi Lemak. I also made the highly popular sirap selaseh with kasturi lime.

None of my friends were there... I wasn't able to contact them. My sister's friends, on the other hand managed to make it. The brownies were a huge hit. So did the pie and sirap selaseh.

That night, we topped it off with a visit to our neighbour living across the street. We ate and talked all night until it was 10pm. I was so tired but my parents were still in the mood for talking. I think they thought that the children must be tired for they decided to take leave.

So that's it! Nothing special but meaningful nonetheless. Sure surprises pop in every now and then .. (i.e. death) but I still think Eid is a day to be cherished.

2008-10-07T15:34:00.003+08:00

The next few days will be memorable...

Hurray! Friday's THE day. Graduation day. It feels melancholic but at the same time, it marks the beginning of a new journey.

I know that graduating from high school is a huge deal. Some are unfortunate to be unable to finish their secondary education. I consider myself blessed and lucky to be able to continue to further my knowledge in the fields I love and cherish.

Well, now that we've come to that... The rehearsals, robe fitting will be held tomorrow. The only things that mars all of this is the fact that my bestie is not going to the graduation ceremony. Too lazy, according to her.

Anyway, there will be a trip to Kelana Jaya this Thursday. There's this tertiary education convention with all the prestigous institutions taking part. It'll be exciting for sure. My only hope would be that the participants won't be MIA on that day. Otherwise, trip's cancelled. It's a chance of a lifetime!

As a side note, I'd like to announce that I have created a website with the sole purpose of publishing my fiction works -including school essays. You may visit http://publiclyunveiled.weebly.com to see for yourself.

To remind all blog readers, SPM (Malaysian Certificate of Education) examinations is just around the corner. In about a month or less.. to be precise, 11th of November, the SPM examinations will begin. Let us do our very best and pass with flying colours. Besides, for SMKDU student, you all have about a week excluding Friday next week off since PMR students are sitting for their public exam. So use the time wisely. I'd even go so far as to extend this advice to myself for I believe I hardly follow my own advice.

That's it for now. Ganbatte ne!

Choice and Consequence

2008-09-28T20:53:00.005+08:00

Everybody likes to go their own way—to choose their own time and manner of devotion.
Jane Austen (1775-1817)

I probably should add this too:

I've put my trust in you
Pushed as far as I can go
For all this
There’s only one thing you should know
I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter

- Linkin Park, In The End

Anyway, it's been about 3 days since I last posted an entry. I've been busy. The last paper, Biology (written practical) aka Paper 3 was on Friday. I really don't have time to blog when my grades are at stake.

Since the trials have finally ended and I have about a month before the real SPM exams, I thought I should at least make an effort to appease my muse.

Right... Back to business. Next Tuesday is the Eidul Fitr. My sister's birthday is the day after. We'll be going to mom's hometown to visit my grandma and the day after, her eldest brother. It's gonna be a brief visit, especially with a cat of my own and two other cats belonging to my neighbour who is also my uncle to take care of.

I personally think that the world according to moi is turning Topsy-turvy. The Lailatulqadr was on the night of 27th September. I missed it. Don't blame me... blame my friggin hormones.

Indeed... it is only a week of school break; 9 days to be exact. But once school reopens, it'll be less than a week until SPM. I'm getting goosebumps just thinking of it. So now, I found myself sticking my nose in my History textbook trying to memorize every single detail to be able to score an 'A'.

Perhaps I should pay attention to my science subjects. I didn't seem to be paying the attention I should have poured onto these subjects. I'm borderline bored about having to memorize chemical reactions and properties and the salts. It's not like I don't like Chemistry, it's just that I'm bored of taking exams. My life so far has somewhat been about acing exams year after year. It does get to you... honest.

So let me see... how does this relate to that Linkin Park song at the beginning of today's post? Simple; I find that it doesn't matter what people say. I would still go my own path. I will be me and not a person I am dictated to be. I am capable of making my own decisions. So I will strive for that success.

That's it for today. I'm off to watch a repeat of Supernatural.

Help!!!

2008-09-23T14:34:00.003+08:00

I've never been so tired before...

Physics and Chemistry papers are done for now. Tomorrow is purely Mathematics -modern maths. I hope I won't make as much careless mistake as I'm prone to do during exams.

Ramadhan will be over in about 5 days. I'm thinking that SPM will follow very soon after. It's only a month until the dreaded SPM.

Anyway, graduation is on the 10th of October. It's a senior affair. Fair enough. I'm not going to the senior prom. Tickets cost about $120-$150. I don't have that much money. SO I'm going to settle on hanging out at home, playing with sakura-neko and improving my skills on the piano.

The recent trials had me miserable enough. I got 6A, 3C and 1D. It's very bad. I have to pull my grades up if I'm ever going to get any scholarship after SPM for further studies.

On the other hand, I have one less thing to worry. The renovations that my house has been going under is almost complete. Cabinets are in, lighting's done, paint jobs are finished. Just exterior painting and timbre decking is all that is left.

In a few hours, my physics tutor is coming in. Dad has asked me to prepare chicken curry for breaking of fast. Let's see... 7.11 pm is the breaking of fast and 6.30 pm is the time I finish my tuition class. You think I might have enough time? I hope so.

Exhausted

2008-09-18T14:01:00.003+08:00

Nobody said it was going to be easy...

Really... I mean, since when trials have ever been easy. Today I sat for Biology Paper 2 and Paper 1. Paper 1 was multiple choice so I think I did okay... I hope.

Paper 2 ... can you tell me what they mean when they show you a polypeptide chain and ask about process Y? What is the process which breaks down polypeptides? I can't remember... I'll look it up later in my textbook. The essay section was quite okay.. I mean inheritance, variation was okay... kind of. Here's the kicker.. I totally forgot that humans have 23 chromosomes only! Chromosome 23 are the sex chromosomes, X and Y. I didn't know what came over me. At least I might get the 2nd subsection right.

Anyway.. I'm having Chemistry papers 1 and 2 tomorrow. Physics is on the day after tomorrow. I'm trying to remember all industry processes and salts properties as well as structures of carbon compounds and everything that has to do with chemistry. I hope I won't forget how to calculate tomorrow as I often do during exams... I seem to experience temporary memory loss during exams.. Just so convenient..

I'm getting started on Portrait of a Lady by Henry James. The book seems quite foreboding considering the typeset and paragraphing. Mind you... I borrowed a thrift edition from my aunt. In fact, I always prefer to buy thrift edition of classics.

Just so you know, I expect to have slow progress with the book seeing as I have a week full of Pure Science and Maths to look up to. Yay me :(

But still... I did pick Pure Science.. so I have to deal with my choice. That means I have to study now.. and this means I have to say bye bye.

I'll talk about the book when I've finished it.

Whirlwind

2008-09-16T14:34:00.004+08:00

I am so in trouble.

I did not study for the trials.. in fact, I couldn't even concentrate during the exams itself. How do I expect to get distiction if I couldn't do that?

So.. I'll be busy getting ready for Thursday's Biology essay, construct and multiple choice papers, that is, paper 1 and 2. Paper 3-practical will be on Thursday next week. I'm going to nail Bio paper once and for all. I CAN do it, I just need to put a lot more effort into my studies. Lately I have been slacking off like you won't believe an SPM candidate will ever do. In the end, I learnt my lesson.. If I don't study, I'll just get a credit. I want a high distinction, not just credit because that's just who I am.

I wonder when I turned from a demanding perfectionist into a slacker. I gotta wake up.

Anyway, Sakura neko-chan pooed on my brother's bed last night. She did it again! Yesterday morning, she pooed on my aunt's sofa. She's lucky it's leather. As punishment for soiling my brother's bed and leaving a VERY long-lasting odour, Sakura is to stay outside for the whole week until she is potty-trained -properly.

My Physics tutor is coming at 4.30 this evening and my sister only lets me use the laptop for a lousy 45 minutes so this is it.

Maybe I'll have time sometime tonight since tomorrow is a public holiday.

Vauge Rememberance

2008-09-15T12:28:00.006+08:00

Here's a kicker... I missed school today. Actually kinda skipped it. I slept in, didn't want to wake up at all. Can you imagine having to be ready by 6.30 am for school? I slept at around 12 am. Assembly starts at 7.15 am and the final call at 7.20. We go to class at about 7.30 am and school ends at 1.05 pm. But since it's the fasting month, we get to go home at 12.30p.m. The Ministry of Education had set the duration for us.

Wednesday is a Public Holiday! Yay! Yet I still have to prepare my CV, Referral letter and copies of certificates and accolades I have accumulated in the past two years for scholarships application. I'm planning to major in Language and Linguistics. My mom is dead set against it. She wants me to major in science or even better, medicine. I don't know.

I'm thinking of researching the current market demand to see which one of those that I can see myself doing with my current credentials. Being a science student cetainly opens up many possibilities but it doesn't help narrow them either.

Tomorrow I will see to it that I wake up and go to school. I really don't need a warning letter from the school. Better be safe than sorry.

Sakura-neko chan

2008-09-15T09:08:00.001+08:00

Last night, our friendly neighbourhood security guard gave us a cat.

A kitten to be precise. She's absolutely adorable. My siblings and I looked up for names.. I wanted to name her Suki but my brother insisted on naming her Sakura. Well.. it's not so bad... If I had to compromise with my brother.. it's either Naruto or Sakura.. I'd choose Sakura a thousand times.

Anyway.. school-based trials have ended. This Thursday, it's a whole new story. This time, state-based trials. Ugh.. Less than 2 months to SPM and I'm dreading it already.

On another update.. I actually passed the UNSW ICAS Mathematics with credits! Last year I only managed to scrape participation. Thank God! As for ICAS English, I pulled a distinction out of the many possibilities. I'm very thankful for the small blessings.

On the other hand, trials have not been so good for me. I never did well in exams whenever I am infected with the flu. It's so darn irritating. In fact, I got a D for Chemistry.

But that's it for now. I have to entertain Sakura. She's starting to get bored already.

Mirror.. Mirror Tell Me..

2008-08-05T21:20:00.000+08:00

It's been a long time since I last fed you guys a new entry. Last March, my family moved to a new place that's quite rural compared to the hectic city life I've lived all my life. Even going to school is a chore now. Since I am still continuing with the same government institution, I've had to wake up as early as 5.30 am to be ready by 6.30 so as to avoid being caught in morning traffic. Trust me.. when I say morning traffic, I mean literally slow movement along the expressway for about two hours. Go figure.

Anyway, back to business. We've missed out on a lot since I last blogged. The School Achievers Awards Ceremony, Prefect's Installation and Stepping Down Ceremony, the Teachers' Day celebration, Mid-Term Exams, Taylor's CLIOD programme, the trip to Monash University (Sunway Campus), NSW Maths Test.. That's a LOT.

Awards Ceremony
- nothing happenned.. except for EST only for me.
Prefects' Installation and Stepping Down ceremony
- Well, I ended my term as Coordinator aka Penyelaras Form 5
Teacher's Day Celebration
- my class danced to the Shakalaka beat. Watch the vid at the end of the post if you don't believe me.
Mid-Term Exams
-didn't do so well. At least add maths and history wasn't a C
Talyor's CLIOD programme
- It was fun! fun! fun! very interesting and exciting. Wish I could do it again.
Trip to Monash Uni.
- Got to see the new campus. It's very modern and conducive. If I ever have a chance to study there, I'd take it.
NSW Maths Test
- I think.. I did OK. Except for the last few questions which I simply calculated since I didn't have enough time.

So.. okay.. This morning I sat for the NSW English Test. I think it was fine enough. But I don't want to be confident just yet. It's tougher than our 1119 English paper but that's to be expected. 60 Qs in 1 hour. That equates to 1Q per minute. Somehow I finished with 10 minutes to spare.. for checking purposes.

Oh yeah.. this August 15th, the Inaugural Annual Prefects Dinner just us prefects is gonna be held. I can't be there but I wish I could. If all goes well, I might just head off to the holy land by the 14th. So, hope and pray.

I'm not gonna

2008-03-12T02:25:00.000+08:00

Write you a love song, that is. Why? That's unnecessary don't you think?

Play Sara Bareilles - Love Song. You'll see what I mean.

This is just a ramble courtesy of a late night fanfiction reading.

Lemons and lemonade

2008-03-11T15:27:00.001+08:00

When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Add some sugar. Some water makes it bearable. Now that's what you call lemonade.

It's not always happy and good in real life. The reality is that life will knock you down to your knees unexpectedly. The grim reaper may show up on your doorstep at really surprising moments. Your heels might get stuck on the pavement. That coffee you made might spill on the paper you've really worked your butt on.

You see.. that's where it matters to sit and think to make lemonades. Those lemons life keeps giving to you, they are useful to an extent. They keep you nourished. This is all figuratively speaking.

Use this pointer:
Lemon - all the bad stuff in life
Sugar - sweet memories + positive thinking
Water - thinking that there are more unfortunate people
Lemonade - A lesson learned from that experience

Why do I say the lemons keep you nourished? This is why: Whenever you experience life for the piercing reality that it is, you learn something from it. Your brain actually keeps that deep within itself. The brain is a marvellous, miraculous thing to ever appear next to the gift of life. If life throws you to your back, get up. Think positively - why did this happen? I'm sure God is thinking of me. Remind yourself that people even more unfortunate than you are right now is suffering worse than you. Lemon+sugar+water=lemonade = priceless lesson in life.

Think about it and tell me how that turns out.

A step into the unknown

2008-03-11T13:19:00.001+08:00

Has anyone ever noticed that the school magazine is the best place for creativity for the form fives leaving the school - for the last time... They get to buy the pages they want and design funny cartoons, captions, reveal personalities of people within the class.

This year, I am 17, facing SPM and while I'm at it, also looking for a scholarship. If I can't, I'll have to get study loan which takes a long time to pay off. I am talking about the experience, final year at a school where you've spend most of your lives in. The place you spend time more than your home, more than anywhere else in the world when you are between 6 and 17.

Nowadays, we find ourselves expressing our opinions so decidedly. We find that we've seen a lot in just 17 years. It's just a small part of growing up. You'll find that once you leave school, there's a scary world out there. What we've experienced in school is just the tip of the dagger. It is the reality every student face here, or anywhere else in the world. Some earlier than us.

The sheltered life as a student is like haven on earth. Once you step on to the world of adulthood, you'll face the problems your parents have faced. Then, you'll realize how hard you parents had it. That when you're still their little girl, they took away most of the pain to have you relatively comfortable in your humble abode. To make you feel safe and sound. Leaving only a taste of it.. all the while taking most of the pain just to protect us.

As a tribute, THANK YOU to all parents out there who have done their best in protecting their children. That while you are doing so, you also leave just enough to teach them to become independent and a human being capable of so many achievements in life. That you are just there when they need you.

Simple Majority? (not for the faint hearted)

2008-03-11T12:26:00.000+08:00

I think not. It's March 11th, 3 days after the 12th General Election. The papers have sold out, people want to know the results and along that comes the shock of the century. For the first time in nearly 40 years, the coalition lost many seats to the opposition and 5 states became stronghold to the opposition. Denied two-thirds majority in parliament may mean more voices. Personally, I say do a post-morterm and find out what the people is trying to say. The people will appreciate that very much.

The papers had a field day. In my opinion, this is the best recorded boost in sales for them in many years. My cousin couldn't get hold of one copy by 5 p.m. Folks, if you want to read papers after the elections, please wake up early and go to your nearest vendor.

The Opposition parties combined their energy this time round. Even the international news media got wind of the shocking results. I suppose, it might not be so shocking after all if you look at current issues. So, this is a lesson which should be learned by all. The people ultimately holds the power of voice in a democratic country. Less corruption, more awareness, and while money does talk, they don't do everything.

Lessons learned for all. People of Malaysia, you have voted and you have decided. It is up to them to perform their part. We have done ours. Like that slice of pizza - it's their part to make it, our part to eat it. Like that old cheesy line; 'I make the batter, you bake it, we'll get a cake'. Those should tell us that the government and people work together to make the country. So kudos to all Malaysian people and I'll see you on the other side.

p.s. I try to stay neutral... and I'm threading a very thin line here. So if I'm not, please tell me and I'll look into it. I'm not in anyway sided with anyone. Just saying my views as a citizen and some do come from the papers. Read too many of them that I decided to give an overview.

Opened

2008-03-11T12:12:00.000+08:00

Ughh... Here comes another blog with another boring stuff splattered among its contents. I tell ya, ya might just be right. But once in a while, I like to give comments on current issues. Not that I'm an expert - NO - but I am a citizen right? So here comes a blog, might be controversial sometimes but I'll keep myself neutral. None of that trouble with the law (na na goody two shoes!) because frankly, I like to keep it cool.